Blue Marina And The Diamonds
7 December 2015, 12:32
Queen of Vlogmas!
Zoella @ 00:01 on December 1st: *lights christmas candles* *bakes christmas cookies* *puts up christmas tree* *wears christmas pyjamas* *whispers in Alfie's ear* CHRISTMAS IS HERE.
During the festive season of Vlogmas, we find ourselves slipping deeper and deeper into Zoe's festive world and when we emerge on the 25th, we find that it's all been a lie because our Christmas game looks like a Pinterest fail compared to hers. There are no freshly baked Christmas cookies and all our friends have turned into Scrooges. We are sad.
Let Zoe guide you through Christmas with her expert and quite frankly perfect tactics... spoiler alert: She's better at it than you.
On Vlogmas 2015 Day 5, Zoe staged a Christmas Photoshoot for Nala. And from this day onwards, no canine will ever surpass her as Most Christmassy Dog To Ever Christmas. Not even if you make your dog wear a Christmas hat and it manages to get more than 11 likes on Instagram. Nope. Game over. Zoe 1 - 0 You.
This year alone, Zoe has managed to collect 14 different styles of Christmas jumper and we bet you haven't even bought yours yet! If we had £100 for every Christmas jumper we've seen her wear in the past 3 years, we would be VERY VERY RICH. Zoe 2 - 0 You.
If we rewatched all your old Christmas home videos, we'd find you sulking in the corner because you didn't get the exact Mobile Phone you wanted, wouldn't we? Not Zoe tho. And we bet you've never rocked a Christmas Day outfit as good as the one above before. Zoe 3 - 0 You.
Let's face it, if it's not in a square box... you're RUINED. Zoe 4 - 0 You.
Zoe doesn't have to deal with Scrooges because her friends are just as Christmassy as her. Meanwhile, every time you try to play Mariah Carey on the AUX Cord, your friends threaten to kill you. Zoe 5 - 0 You.
CINDY LOU IS REAL!!!! Zoe 6 - 0 You.
Remember that year Zoe had 5 advent calendars?! Did your Mum even buy you an advent calendar this year? Nope. Zoe 7 - 0 You.
You could traipse around the entire globe looking for a perfect Norway Spruce but you'll never be able to find one as perfect as Zoe's. It's like Santa sent it down especially because she's such a stan. Zoe 8 - 0 You.
Official petition to make Zoe the new Mrs Claus starts here. MERRY CHRISTMAS YA FILTHY ANIMALS.