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5 October 2016, 12:48
From the Skeleton Clique to Matty's minions (is that a name?), let's analyse those cries for attention...
You know the drill by now: you're at a concert by your favourite band, all waiting patiently for things to kick off and then, suddenly, the lights go out and everybody loses their sh*t.
But which crowd loses the most sh*t? We aimed to find out.
So using "science", we have searched high and low across YouTube to find and analyse the loudest crowd cheers from some of our favourite concerts of the year so, at long last, we can crown the loudest fans of 2016. Grab your strepsils and a lemsip kids - some throats are about to get red raw with fangirl screaming!
Matty and the boys definitely benefit from a triple scream opening to their live show; one when the lights go out, a second one when they walk on stage and a third when those iconic pink lights spark up. By the time the crowd reaches that final scream they are so hyped that only Allen the dog, parked side of stage (probably), can hear the full extent of the madness in the moshpit.
Scream Rating: I Like It When You Scream For You Are So Beautiful Yet So Unaware Of The Pain In My Inner Ear Drum From Standing Next To You.
Another solid opening but the screaming fades very quickly as every member of the crowd chants all the lyrics en masse like some kind of pop punk cult. Still, a bonus squeal reaches glass-shattering levels when Brendon makes those "high heels work" during the bridge. Any shirt removals or back flips tend to illicit similar responses.
Scream Rating: Have some composure! Where is your posture?
Much like the directioners before them, the teen fans at this show are pretty difficult to beat in a screaming contest. Plus the boys have added a staggered intro to this tour, meaning there is the opportunity for up to 5 scream breaks before the track even kicks in properly. Plus major points to the fandom for being able to sustain the same noise level throughout a 2 hour set.
Scream Rating: Sounds loud, feels loud.
The clique always go hard and this insanely energetic album and show opener definitely gets them in the right frame of mind. Plus, amazingly, you don't need any mics on the audience to hear them shouting out every single high-speed word of that rap! Mad skills y'all.
Scream Rating: "She's the tear in my vocal chords, I'm on fire..."
One sure-fire way to get the people screaming is to open your show with your BIGGEST EVER HIT!!! Ballsy? Of course. But FOB have more hits than Pete has made pretentious statements, so they can throw away a classic early on with ease.
Scream Rating: Thnx Fr Th Erch (Earache. Obviously.)
Nothing like a bit of theatre, is there? Even in the grimy confines of London's Heaven club, Melanie still brings a stage show complete with props and stage dressing, busting out of an ACTUAL CRIB to drop into "Cry Baby". In the real world the sight of a grown woman breaking through a giant crib on a musical cue would be terrifying but in this context, we are HYPED!
Scream Rating: The song is called Cry Baby. We don't need another pun.
So that's what we think. But what have we "learned"?