This Taylor Swift Parody Twitter Will Give You Actual Nightmares
8 May 2015, 12:55 | Updated: 8 May 2017, 17:09
"Eldritch T-Swift" is a nightmare dressed like an even worse nightmare.
I'm just gonna throw it out there: Some things simply should not be. There are just entities in the world that were not meant to exist. And a Twitter account dedicated to mashing up the lyrics of the awesome yet wholesome Taylor Swift with the horrifically dark and warped world of eldritch horror is one of those things.
but you'll come back each time you leave, cause darling, i'm a nightmare so vivid—so potent—that you become strangely reliant on its horrors— Eldritch T-Swift (@EldritchSwift) May 4, 2015
The terrifying brainchild of YA author and Twitter user Riley Redgate, "Eldritch T-Swift" adopts the unsettling world and writing style of an H.P. Lovecraft novel, and mashes it up with the lyrics of one of our favourite pop stars. The result? A hair-raising series of Tweets that have instantly become our new nightmare fodder.
welcome to new york. it's been waiting for you. grates dripping with drool. subway tunnels filling with rancid breath. it's waited so long.
— Eldritch T-Swift (@EldritchSwift) May 7, 2015
our song is the slamming screen door. the clicking lock. the creaking of our hastily constructed barricade. the creature's frustrated scream— Eldritch T-Swift (@EldritchSwift) May 3, 2015
YOU STOP THAT RIGHT NOW.
i could show you incredible things: magic, madness, heaven, sin, a very old woman with unblinking pupilless eyes that see your true past— Eldritch T-Swift (@EldritchSwift) May 1, 2015
I DO NOT ENJOY THIS CONTENT
this love is good, this love is bad. this love is alive, back from the dead. but its eyes are glassy and fixed, and a rotting stench lingers— Eldritch T-Swift (@EldritchSwift) May 5, 2015
NOPE NOPE NOPE
Like I said, this Twitter account should not be. We should forget it exists, bury it deep in the woods where it can't affect anyone ever agai-
are we out of the woods yet? are we out of the woods? no—we've passed this thicket before, with the bleeding trees. we are deeper than ever.— Eldritch T-Swift (@EldritchSwift) May 3, 2015
OH COME ON.