13 Pictures Of Ansel Elgort That Should Come With A Thirst Warning
28 March 2017, 17:04 | Updated: 8 May 2017, 17:09
Can someone pass us a glass of water please?
Did you know that Ansel Elgort possesses healing properties? Well, it's true. The multi-talented actor, singer, songwriter, DJ and all round thirst trap is thought to be so otherworldly that just looking at his Instagram account could rid the human race of many of it's problems. Let us break it down for you.
1. Here’s Ansel working up a sweat on the ranch. Not long after looking upon this photo our crops were fully replenished.
Ansel is saving the agriculture industry one thirst-trap photo at a time.
2. Did you know this photo Ansel on a horse will cure you of your equinophobia? It's true.
Nay bad dreams for you anymore.
3. Ansel's top knot is scientifically proven to remove 99.9% percent of all germs.
So fresh and so clean.
4. One look of this photo and you’ll be immunised against dysentery forever.
What a relief.
5. One ride on Ansel’s surfboard and everyone will fall drunk in love with you.
If it feels like a miracle, that's because it is.
6. Two looks at this outfit and you’ll be cured of your fuccboi addiction.
However, you will develop an Edward Scissorhands fetish. Swings and roundabouts eh?
7. Scientists believe this photo might be able to slow global warming just enough to save the polar bears.
This is such great news.
8. This photo is thought to have healing properties. Keep a copy in your medical care box at all time.
Instructions: take one look in the morning, one look in the afternoon, and then as many looks as necessary until you pass out in the evening.
9. If you look hard enough into Ansel’s eyes you’ll turn into a pre-raphaelite artist from 1848.
Paint me like one of your French girls, Ansel.
10. But if you look into Ed Sheeran's eyes for too long you’ll be visited by the Galway Girl's ghost in your sleep.
Harrowing.
11. This photo has been known to lower interest rates and bring stability to stock markets.
I don't know about you but my NASDAQ is rising.
12. If you sold this photo on the black market, it’s expected that you’ll earn enough to pay off all your college debts.
There might even be enough left over for a Dominos.
13. Is there nothing this man can't do?
No.
